Nirdu is The House

Several quick notes because I don't feel like typing out a whole big long thing. Had an eventful weekend and now I'm bored and feel like posting SOMETHING, so I'll post my recent wrestling thoughts.

- Mark Henry injured Kurt Angle who will now require time off to heal. THIS IS BULLSHIT!!! Ten years later and the WWE still hasn't realized Mark Henry is a pointless, talentless failure. Cut the strings, let him go. He's put two, TWO, big money main eventers out with injuries due to his fat shitiness. Batista and Kurt Angle are both out because of him. FIRE THIS USELESS LARDASS.

- Giant Bernard (A-Train, Prince Albert) won the New Japan Cup and will get a shot at Brock Lesnar's IWGP Heavyweight championship. Give me a goddamn break. Are the Japanese SOOOOOOO excited by us roundeyes that a shitty Smackdown match like this will be fought over their "most important" title?! You had YUJI FUCKING NAGATA lose in the finals of the NJC to that hairy pile of worthless. Start building up some native stars and have some native vs native fueds that are worth something! Tanahashi vs Nakamura is money, build on it!

- Ring of Honor is beginning to bore me. Too many people are leaving, too few people I care about are left. Still, you get quality matches and we are in the reign of one of their best champions ever. Yet a lot is lacking in the undercard. ROH stars become so popular they are in demand all over the world and work fewer dates, or are picked off by the other companies. There is still a lot of good going on, but I'm starting to get bored with the company. I just don't care about the CZW feud or the new future stars, Adam Pearce and Claudio Castignoli.

- I read reports that Rey Mysterio is going to drop the title to JBL!!!! HOW HORRIBLE IS THAT?! That damned glorified midcarder is going to take the title off poor Rey Rey. The title really needs to be kept away from JBL, aren't there any better heels on Smackdown? Has the show really fallen THAT far? If he does win the title, my hope is that it's just a transitional thing until an RVD or Batista title win. I think JBL will win it, RVD will win it off him and then jump ship to the ECW brand. Or something.

- Backlash is tonight, I'll update or post again after it is over, providing there is a new champion. GO EDGE!

Katsumoto: You believe a man can change his destiny?
Algren: I think a man does what he can, until his destiny is revealed.

SO, today a lot of my stress was relieved. First of all, I plucked out those annoying white hairs in my beard. Yeah, I've been that on edge. Secondly, I finally did my presentation in my capstone Ethics class. This one presentation pretty much determined my college career, and I believe that I did pretty motherfucking slamming! I've been busting my ass in order to get this thing perfectly timed and perfectly written and to shake out the jitters. In the end it didn't come off as well as I had wanted, but I think I did a damn fine job. Damn fine.

I had to be all dressed up in order to do this presentation. Light formal, enough to be presentable. That meant I didn't have to wear a tie, praise Allah. I had to look somewhat professional, my professor demanded it. He's some former CNN big shot producer guy. Anywigger, I was going to change out of my formal stuff but I decided "fuck it". I may as well walk around all Naiched-up, look snazzy for once in my life. I felt worth almost something, almost. So I'm still dressed up, and still styling and profiling. Hells yeah.

Now all I have left is four articles, an in depth article, three history papers, one more ethics paper and two features. Yippee-ki-yay motherfucker.

John McClane: You know how to fire one of these?
Zeus: No.
John McClane: No?
Zeus: Hey, all brothers don't know how to use guns, you racist motherfucker.

Jesus Buddha-Beating Christ, ECW HAS RETURNED FROM THE DEAD!!!!! After being forced out of business in 2001, Vince McMahon is set to revive the company after the success of the first ECW reunion show and the instant sell-out of the second one. It is being revived as a secondary company with Tommy Dreamer and Paul Heymon in charge. What will happen from all of this? Only good things, my rodents, only good things.

Third roster split, development territory, new titles, new TV show, the possibilities are endless. I can't wait for more news. I'm not as excited as I might have been 3 or so years ago, since I have Japanese wrestling and ROH to tide me over. Still, this is cool news.



Joey Styles: We just fixed that wall!

"Sabu has a broken arm, but will still work the Lockdown PPV Sunday."

That's right, Sabu has a broken fucking arm, but is going to shrug it off and work the PPV X division title match against Samoa Joe. While the quality of the match may dip, you have to give props to the man who never quits. Sabu, even at the age of 42, has no quit in him and lets no injury ever hold him back from performing. Here's to you, Sabu, the man who shrugs off broken limbs and keeps going.

After almost 2 minutes of consideration, this is my list of top 5 favorite killer finishers in wrestling. Feel free to add your list in comments. This is as of today and all time, and as you can see they are mostly "dangerous" style finishers.

1. BURNING HAMMER - KENTA KOBASHI


2. TIGER DRIVER '91 - MITSUHARU MISAWA


3. KI KRUSHER '99 - LOW KI


4. STONE COLD STUNNER - STEVE AUSTIN


5. BUSAIKU KNEE KICK - KENTA


Okay so maybe the Busaiku isn't a "death" style finisher, and I used to hate it. BUT I LOVE IT. I love shouting out BUSAIKU when anybody hits this damn thing.

Jack Crow: Valek is the original! The source of the disease! The first vampire created by the Catholic Church...
Father Adam Guiteau: By accident...
Jack Crow: SHUT THE FUCK UP!

Holidays don't really mean much around my place. Nobody ever comes home for them, with the exception of Christmas. We don't have large family gatherings and we don't go out of our way to invite any family members. Generally for stuff like Easter or Thanksgiving, we just have those of us living in this house and maybe my aunt will show up. Nothing special. Most holidays are just like any other day. Today is no different. My mother, spendaholic that she is, gives us some crap that she bought for us whenever we wake up (11:00 for me today) and then everybody just does their own thing until it's time to eat "the meal". One of maybe five meals a year the family, as much of it as is here, eats together.

These are the unimportant holidays anyway. I've never much cared for Easter, as it used to mean a church trip and a long boring day with nothing to do. Now it's just a long boring day with nothing to do.

I smell something on fire. Something on fire through the rain. It's a nice day out today, I know ya'll will bitch about rain, but I certainly love a nice rainy day.

UPDATE: I threw an egg at my cat, but missed. I threw him outside into the rain, which he hated, and threw an egg at him. But, like I said, it missed and landed in the driveway. He ran back inside. Easter is boring.

...and stuff, whatever, wanted to post.

Kupo!

Will Turner: We're going to steal a ship? That ship?
Jack Sparrow: Commandeer. We're going to commandeer that ship. Nautical term.

It looks like NOAH isn't going to run a Tokyo Dome show this year.

I guess it makes sense. No point in trying to run a house show style card at the Tokyo Dome. If you can't present at least three dream matches, it would never sell. Crappy attendences at the Tokyo Dome leave your company image in the dumpster. Look at New Japan. If you can't get the big dream matches that will capture the excitement of the fans enough to draw them in to the overpriced Dome, just run a Budokon show I suppose.

The show would likely have been main evented by Jun Akiyama vs Kenta Kobashi or Kensuke Sasaki. While good matches, there wouldn't have been enough under that one match to captivate the crowd. Misawa vs Kobashi? Not yet. Bring in someone from NJPW or AJPW? Nobody worth it. Major indy wrestler? Maybe, but scheduling conflicts prevent the big boys from showing.

While it sucks that NOAH won't have the most attended wrestling event in the world this year, they'll still put something good on. The Budokon card is sure to be just as good as a Tokyo Dome card, just with lesser names. Just keep Akiyama vs Sasaki for the main event. As long as KENTA, Marufuji, Misawa, Kobashi and Taue have good match ups it'll be a certain sell out.

Deputy Trudy Wiegel: Raineesha Williams is a loudmouth, backstabbing, Jew. I wanna say Jew but I think she's in fact very openly Catholic, which I have a problem with, too.

So I just signed up for my last semester of classes ever at UMaine. It feels odd to know that that is the last time I ever have to meet an advisor or go through the process of waiting for the servers on Web DSIS to clear up so I can login to register. That air of finality is starting to hit me, and honestly I'm getting a bit freaked. Luckily I have plans. Shaky plans, but plans. If I didn't have Japan I don't know what I'd do with my life. Probably hang around this shitty area and save up enough money to leave Maine.

I still have a long way to go, though. I don't graduate until December... which is a long way off. Still... it's closer than ever. If I had been keeping up with my schedule, I would be graduating in a month. That thought freaks me out the most, and I'm kinda thankful I didn't stay on that track. I get a little more time. Just a little. But my education is almost over, and I have so little to show for it. That piece of paper that essentially says "I graduated college," will be worth a hell of a lot though. I can do anything with it.

Still, I'm freaked. The end is nearing, ever so slowly.
But like I said, I have plans. I'm going to Japan. I tell that to everyone. I get a lot of different reactions. But I have to go. I really, really have to go. I have no reason to stay. There's nothing here for me. I keep telling myself that.

I'm done being serious for now. I promise my next post will be about wrestling. It helps me escape, occupy my mind. NOAH, ROH, TNA. That'll be my next post.

THE GATES OF HELL
Per me si va ne la città dolente,
per me si va ne l'etterno dolore,
per me si va tra la perduta gente.
Giustizia mosse il mio alto fattore:
fecemi la divina podestate,
la somma sapienza e 'l primo amore.
Dinanzi a me non fuor cose create
se non etterne, e io etterno duro.
Lasciate ogne speranza, voi ch'intrate

I have cursed God
Now I beg for some mercy
Can he forgive me

So very many mistakes
Pain of a hundred lessons
Is happiness near

Patient will prosper
A better person walks now
Happy I shall be

It's the weekend and I can put the stress of last week behind me.

Seriously, I was so fucking out of my mind that I could barely handle any of it. I've calmed down now. I'm fine. No worries. Well, not many. I did my work, slept almost not-at-all, and have had some time to clear my mind. I have a couple of days of rest before I start up another shite week. I don't have as much work due, but I do have to come up with FOUR articles for Public Affairs reporting. And more stuff for Feature Writing. And for German History. Next week is going to suck. But every week sucks. I'm getting stressed thinking about all that work, so I'm not going to.

Tomorrow I'm doing nothing. Nothing at all. Nothing at all. Nothing at all. I SHOULD do something, but I honestly don't give a fuck.

So anyway, I'm all better. All calm. No need to worry. I let a lot of shit get to me, but I put it behind me. Turned my back. Did my work. Eased my mind... somewhat. I'm chill.

Well, see ya'll when I see ya'll. Soon, ya?

Let you alone! That's all very well, but how can I leave myself alone? We need not to be let alone. We need to be really bothered once in a while. How long is it since you were really bothered? About something important, about something real?
- Farenheit 451

WrestleMania XXII happened last night and I watched it live, the first PPV I've watched live in years. Let me tell you, it was well worth the price of... uh, free.


MOMENT OF THE NIGHT, REY MYSTERIO WINS THE WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE!
This just makes a great year even greater... at least in terms of wrestling.
Rey Rey came out dressed as an Aztec king, with POD playing his music live and in person. The entrance put Angle's and Orton's to shame, we never should've doubted that Rey was going to earn his rightful place as champion of the world. It can never be taken away. The match was dissapointingly short, but the moment was worth it all.
So many good champions this year.


The rest of the night was actually really good and I came away satisfied. Edge vs Foley was a great hardcore brawl, and Joey Styles' commentary really helped this match of the night. Edge put it all on the line and Foley was there to make Edge look like a god. It worked.

The Money in the Bank ladder match was a spotty funfest. Seriously, they were pulling shit out of nowhere. Props to RVD and Benjamin who both really shined in this. And Naich was taking crazy bumps the likes of which he's never done before. Finley was taking cool bumps too, hell even Lashley was taking bumps like nuts. It ended properly with RVD getting the win and a guaranteed title match. Can he finally get the title he SOOOOOO deserves. Heel Cena vs Face RVD?


The real main event, the match at the top of the card was actually quite good. No 5 star classic, but good enough and with enough crowd craziness to be better than last years top match. First off the entrances were NUTS! Triple H the barbarian was just fucking great. The King of Kings was just so cool. John Cena's entrance as a 1930s Chicago mobster was ok, but it was infinately redeemed by the appearance of CM PUNK MOTHERFUCKER! He was front and center as a mobster, pulling off his cocky heel Punk face. Gotta love it.
The crowd HATED Cena and LOVED Trips. This really made the ending make sense, Cena retained and literally shocked the crowd. It worked, I think he'll turn heel in some form and really come into his own. He'll drop the title soon, though.

The womens title match was actually decent, but still the womens division is a joke. At least Alexis Laree is a wrestler, not a "diva". The pillow fight bullshit had me fuming that it was above Rey.

Anyway, decent show with some really good moments.

BOOYAKA BOOYAKA, REY MYSTERIO!

I've decided that I no longer want to live my life as a White Man. I've decided to get an ethnicity-change and become a Black Man. I shall from henceforth be known as Jamal Raquando Shareef-Squanggo!




APRIL FOOLS!
I've really decided to become Mexican.